The 26 Replies by The Cult of Art of War on Why Their Sunzi Strategies Fail

Following is a listing of the top 26 replies by The Cult of Art of War whenever their Sunzi strategies did not work:
26. Where were you when this problem occurred?

25.  I was busy shopping for that special tramslation of Sunzi that I saw Wesley Snipes was reading in the Passenger 57 movie.
24.  I was too busy quoting Michael Douglas lines from the Wall Street movie
23.  I was too busy watching the Art of War movie marathon on the Grit channel.
22.  I was taking inspirational advice from a female strategist (from the East Coast) who claimed that being happy is everything.  
21.  You don't say.

20. That’s weird…

19. It’s never done that before.

18. It worked yesterday.

17. How is that possible?

16. It must be a tactical performance problem.  Therefore, the fault is not mine's.

15. What did I say to get the team to walk out on me? 

14. There has to be something funky in the implementation of the tactics.

13. I haven’t practiced that Sun Bin tactic (or that stratagem from 36 Strategems)  in weeks.

12. We must utilized the wrong translation of Sunzi

11. It’s just some unlucky coincidence.

10. I can’t think of everything !

09. Someone told me if I read Sunzi before the meeting, that I will win.
08. It works, but the tactic hasn’t been thoroughly tested yet.

07. Somebody must have changed my instruction. Identify that "meathead." 

06. While my goal is to triumph over the competition without a bloodshed , I just had to go opposite.
05. Even though it doesn’t work, How does it feel?

04. You can’t use that tactic with my team.

03. Why do I have to assess the situation, don't you know who I am?

02.  My version of Sunzi did not resolve my inner demons

01. It worked on my head while I am sniffing crack